Forgiven or forgotten

Have we forgotten? Have we forgiven? The 16th of February in Izghe, 25th of February in Yobe, 20th of May - Jos, 28th June – Abuja, 29th of November- Kano. Have we forgotten how we almost broke the internet with the “Bring back our girls” campaign? Was empathy from our president too much to ask?  Have we forgotten the promises in 2011? Have we forgiven the embezzling? Who told our children stealing was not corruption? Isn't a man’s integrity best judged by the little things he chooses to ignore? We can continue to pretend all is well, but can we afford to?

After all, whose children lie in shallow graves? Whose daughters sit in the claws of captivity? Whose sons were trampled in an examination exercise? Who visited the hospitals only to be told the doctors or health workers were on strike, again? Who braved the sun's scourging to occupy Nigeria? Whose children were massacred in schools? Whose sisters, brothers and mothers left for business but never returned? Who dies of thirst at the well of empty promises? Who can save us from this menace? Who votes?

Come February, we will not be caught between the devil and the deep blue sea. We will be standing between the devil, the deep blue sea, and our prejudice. We admire the battle cry of change, but we know too well from past experience, a promise made is not a promise fulfilled. We are standing in the darkness of the familiar, from five presidential candidates we only acknowledge two potential presidents. Politics might just be more like athletics and less like wine, older is not better. Caught between the lesser of two evils, whomever we pick is a bad choice. Nigerians, what reason do we have to vote come February?

To an unborn child.

Dear child, 

Growing up happens fast. It’s not about the numbers that we keep count of but the person you slowly and unknowingly become. The level of understanding you start to attain. Being grown up is beautiful, but I must advise you;

Recognize the job trap. Being jobless does not mean being useless, because feeling useless often ends in feeling life is meaningless. Literally! Man shall not live by bread alone. Do not become an adult with all to live by but nothing to live for, with all the means but no meaning.

When you come to the cloud that will for a period, wrap your silver lining. Beware of the three brothers; depression, aggression, addiction. They come in bottles; they come as cancer sticks caked with nicotine; they come as colorful foil packed capsules. They are often one small thing that begs you indulge, just once. Beware of fleeting satisfaction. The devil is not one big demon we slay once, but the little nothing's that come dressed as pleasures to which we must constantly deny ourselves.

Your conscience is not a nagging wife, it is a cautious guide; the rudder of your ship, your inbuilt constitution. Do not murder it with constant ignoring. What a man can do once, he might do again. It is easier to curb the first desire than it will be to satisfy the one’s that will follow. 

 
Have new experiences.  Soon you will begin to forget the last time you did something for the first time. Routine and passivity sets in.  Experience is as valuable as achieving. It is the inward companion to its outward counterpart. After all you keep your achievements for the world but your experiences are all you keep for yourself.

Most things in life are like fine china, you will learn this with time. They break with ease. Do not let anything that breaks leave you broken; Relationships, dreams or trust. Fear generalization, what applies to some does not apply to all. 

You were not made to be perfect. Adulthood comes with a bucket of excuses where you can pick when you go wrong. “The devil made me do it?”, “It’s because of the bad economy”, or my favorite “I had to do it”…. stop it! You can be wrong, you will be wrong. Explain but do not excuse. Take responsibility. Seek forgiveness and forgive yourself.

Finally, never forget you don't live once. You live daily through your good decisions, and die daily still by the bad ones. Believe in faith, but leave nothing to chance. In the words of Viktor E. FrankL “if you must howl with the wolves remain a sheep in wolves clothing”.

Forget feminism and be a woman.

  Feminism is the new black. Any woman who prefers to make a lot out of her supposedly little self must be either a self acclaimed or society proclaimed feminist. I have come to despise this stereotype that puts together in a box of rebellion, outspokenness, and ambition all women who dare to want to be something. So after one too many confrontations with friends and strangers I want to state publicly I do not know what feminism is I only know about being a woman.

  A woman earns her respect by being respectable, working for what she desire's and not waiting on a man like a sunflower waits for the sun to bloom.  A woman believes in the values of marriage but it isn't  the only thing she's defined by.  A woman does not challenge the strength of a man; she only refuse's to be called weak because she is a woman.

   I believe in what I believe in not because I am a woman but because I am human. We are all human first and anything else second. That alone should be enough reason to treat a woman like one.

Why wait for 1/01...

   Our flight through 2014 is slowly coming to its climax. At this juncture if you, like myself made resolutions, promises, and goals at the beginning of the year you might be taking stock. Assessing the kept, the fulfilled, and the never attempted. Satisfaction being equal to how many do’s we got round to achieving.

   Fact is, we often know what we need to do. The poisonous darlings we ought to kill, the habits we should break, but we all prefer to wait for the famous first of January to begin.

   We must realize the New Year is just that, a new year. It does not suddenly confer on us greater self discipline or stronger will power. You want to shed some weight? Forget the first of January, start running today. Need to quit smoking? Don’t drag that next stick of cigarette. The company that’s doing you no good, if you intend to cut the strings in the New Year you might as well cut them now. Better sooner than later.
   Today, tomorrow, any day is equally appropriate. You do not need to plan towards being a better you next year, enter the next year better, healthier and wiser.

Once upon a 23 year old Nigerian minister.

During an interview session the featured guest mentioned how Nigeria thirty plus years ago had a twenty three year old minister. I was taken aback. With all the compulsory primary social studies education and museum excursions I had never heard anything of the sort. So I did a little research. Oh, the things we find when we bother to look.

Matthew  Tawo Mbu, born on the 20^th of November 1929 in Okundi Crossriver state was a Nigerian lawyer, Politician, diplomat and a figure in Nigerian political affairs for more than fifty years. He was driven into a career in politics by these words from his childhood mentor ‘Fr Patrick Meeham’- “you are for your people; you go and speak for them”.

His legislative and ministerial posts include:

·         Member representing Ogoja in the Eastern house of assembly and House of Representatives (1952- 1953) at the age of twenty three.

·         Member for Ogoja in the House of Representatives (1954-1955).

·         Member of Parliament for Ogoja (1960-1966).

·         Federal minister of labour (1953- 1954).

·         Ag. Minister of transport (1954) e.t.c

The list is lengthy with over twenty official positions, and since this is not a political history thesis I have mentioned only the relevant few. Let me mention briefly, Obasanjo (vice president at 37), Buhari (governor of north eastern Nigeria at 33), and Gowon in 1966 at the age of 32 became the youngest Nigerian  president ever. When did we fall asleep?  We must rise from this passive coma and dump the ‘someone else must do it’ complex. If we are waiting for the system to change first, we will keep waiting. We must learn to serve and serve diligently. Not serving for what we will get but for what we can give. Once upon a time a 23 year old Nigerian minister, that time must come again.

Nigerian Definitions by Elnathan John.

These are definitions to popular terms used by Nigerians. Tweeted by Elnathan John whose ability to create trouble is only second to his excellent writing.

•COMOT (v): To comot means to leave

E.g. If Jona no fit stop the war, make e comot make we see road.

•MUMU (n): 1. a man newly in love

                     2. A dull, foolish or slow person

E.g. plenty mumu people go still vote Jonathan again.

•BLOCCOS (n): Scrotum. E.g. Na only touch I touch am o, na im she come nack me for bloccos.

•DRESS (v): To dress means to make space or shift.

E.g. Please dress so I can sit

•UNCLE (n): 1. Father/mothers male sibling

                      2. An older man known to your family

                      3. An older, married secret male lover

•CLOSEUP (n): Any brand of toothpaste E.g. CloseUp, Macleans, Colgate

•FRIEND (v): To friend means to have a sexual relationship.

E.g. "Na Goodluck dey friend Diezani"

•COUSIN/COUSIN BROTHER/COUSIN SISTER (n):

 1. Anyone related to you, however remote.

 2. One who grew up in your family home.

•ASHAWO (n):

1. (pejorative)Female sex worker

 2. (more common) Any sexually active woman who refuses to have sex with you.

When is tomorrow? why the youths must demand thirty percent or nothing.

FACTS

• Where does charity begin? In Uganda. Proscovia Alengot Oromait, in 2012 at the age of 19 was elected a Member of Parliament. Today she’s 21, older, wiser and still in power.

• Kaniella Ing, 25, state senator in the 11th house district of the Hawaii state house of representatives. He was elected in 2012 and assumed office in 2013.

• Pierre-Luc Dusseault, 23 year is a member of parliament in Canada. He became a member of the new Democratic Party at the age of nineteen.

• Wyatt Roy, 24 year old member of the parliament of Australia. Elected into office at the age of 20. 

• Alex B. Morse is the mayor of the city of Holyoke elected in 2011 at the age of 22, reelected in 2013. Currently 25.

• 22 year old Anton Amade Abele was elected to the Swedish parliament at the age of 18 in 2010.

The brainwashing began way back in primary school, matching in line, in plain shorts and striped shirts we sang ‘we are the leaders of tomorrow’ but When is tomorrow? An uncertain future, an unpredictable period of time. For most of us tomorrow will never come, for others tomorrow will come when we're too old. We must demand our place; if we never ask the answer will always be no. The youths must stop thinking like leaders of tomorrow and begin to think like leaders; for a leader knows there will be no tomorrow if he does not build himself today.